Today, Voldemort told me I have to kill Dumbledore. FML.
—Draco Malfoy
Today, Voldemort hugged me. In front of everyone. FML.
—Draco Malfoy
Today, I tried to show affection by giving Draco a hug. Now everyone keeps making fun of me. FML.
—Voldemort
Today, I stole Longbottom’s Remembrall. Now Potter has a Nimbus 2000 and is on the Quidditch team. FML.
—Draco Malfoy
Today, I tried to eavesdrop on Malfoy. He Petrified me, broke my nose, and left me under my Invisibility Cloak on the Hogwarts Express. FML.
—Harry Potter
Today, Malfoy insulted Buckbeak. Buckbeak reacted exactly as I told the class he would, but he and I are the ones in trouble? FML.
—Hagrid
Idea Credit: blu3y3zz
Today, I tried to curse Malfoy. It backfired. Now I can’t stop belching up slugs. FML.
—Ron Weasley
Today, a professor turned me into a ferret. FML.
—Draco Malfoy
Today, Voldemort hugged me…in front of everyone. FML.
—Draco Malfoy
Credit to ilovepotteringabout!
