Today, I tried to eavesdrop on Malfoy. He Petrified me, broke my nose, and left me under my Invisibility Cloak on the Hogwarts Express. FML.
—Harry Potter
Today, I saw that Snape may have been right about what my father was like at Hogwarts. FML.
—Harry Potter
Today, we have boils that make sitting on a broomstick a right pain in the—
FML.
—Fred and George Weasley
Today, Ludo Bagman paid us in leprechaun gold. FML.
—Fred and George Weasley
Today, I blew up my aunt. FML.
—Harry Potter
Today, I forgot to take my potion. Then I almost attacked Harry, Ron, and Hermione, let Wormtail go free, and ensured that Sirius would have to remain a fugitive. FML.
—Remus Lupin
Idea credit to positive-thinkers!
Today, everyone got to go to Hogsmeade except me. FML.
—Harry Potter
Today, I have to stay in my mother’s house and clean rather than do something useful for the Order. FML.
—Sirius Black
Today, Neville Longbottom turned a boggart into me, dressed in his grandmother’s clothing, vulture hat and all. FML.
—Severus Snape
Today, Malfoy insulted Buckbeak. Buckbeak reacted exactly as I told the class he would, but he and I are the ones in trouble? FML.
—Hagrid
Idea Credit: blu3y3zz